


glasses

by vvelna



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Alternate Universe, First Meetings, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-21
Updated: 2018-07-21
Packaged: 2019-06-13 17:28:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15369627
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vvelna/pseuds/vvelna
Summary: Dan and Phil meet in a public bathroom.





	glasses

**Author's Note:**

> this fic was inspired by a true story—the story of me accidentally punching myself in the face and breaking my glasses. the circumstances of my misfortune were quite different and did not involve any cuteness, but mercifully took place in the privacy of my own bedroom.

Dan’s shoulders shook with barely contained laughter. He felt awful—he really did—but he’d just watched a man accidentally punch himself in the face while trying to yank a paper towel out of the dispenser. His glasses flew off his face and he honked like a surprised goose.

Dan had just exited a public bathroom stall when he saw it all go down. He hurried over to the sink to wash his hands first, then—doing his best to swallow his laughter—approached the man who was now fumbling around on his hands and knees, like Velma looking for her glasses.

“Uh, do you need some help? That floor must be really filthy. I wouldn’t rub myself all over it if I were you.”

The man jolted up in surprise, just missing cracking his head on the underside of a sink.

“Oh my god!” he cried, rotating awkwardly on his butt to squint up at Dan.

“Sorry,” said Dan, squatting down. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”

The amusement Dan had derived from the situation was quickly being replaced by a feeling of awkwardness. He felt embarrassed for the guy and himself. He should’ve just slipped back into the stall and closed the door, pretending he hadn’t seen anything. He could’ve just waited in there until the man retrieved his glasses and left.

“That’s okay,” said the man, “but I can’t find my glasses.” He pouted cutely, all big eyes and pursed lips, and Dan felt personally attacked.

“I’m Dan,” he said, as if it was a great time to introduce himself.

“Um, Phil. Would you mind…?”

“Oh! Of course!”

Why was he so flustered? It wasn’t the first time he’d seen a cute guy.

Dan scooted forward on the balls of his feet to avoid touching the floor with his hands or knees, and reached around Phil to where his glasses were hiding in the shadows beneath the sink. When he picked them up, one of the lenses fell out.

“Shit,” he muttered, right before he lost his balance and tumbled headfirst into Phil’s lap.

Dan wished for nothing more than death in that moment, face squished against Phil’s chest and body wedged between his thighs. He scrambled away from Phil as quickly as he could, stuttering out apologies.

Phil just giggled, raising his hands up to cover his mouth. At the last second before they actually touched his face, he apparently remembered where they’d just been and flung them away. Everything about the way Phil moved was odd, Dan thought. Like he didn’t have full control of his body, or wasn’t aware of the length of his limbs.

Dan reached beneath the sink again, resting on his knees with one hand propping him up—unsanitary conditions be damned—and retrieved the black frames and the wayward lens.

“Well, I found your glasses. But...”

“Is it bad?”

“Kind of?”

It wasn’t just that the lens had popped out—the frames themselves had broken, a single snap in the black plastic that had surrounded the lens.

He passed the frames and the lens to Phil so he could see for himself. Phil brought them close to his face and his eyes widened with worry.

“Oh no…oh no…what do I do?”

He sounded distressed to a degree that made Dan want to hug him, but he figured he’d already invaded Phil’s personal space enough for one day.

“I don’t really know how these things work—perfect vision privilege and all that—but can’t you take them to, uh, a glasses shop? To get fixed? Or buy new ones?”

“A glasses shop.”

Dan didn’t know why Phil sounded so smug. There were definitely shops that sold glasses. It’s not like he was completely ignorant.

“Yeah…or a glasses repairman?”

Phil snorted. “You’re cute,” he said, under his breath. His voice was just quiet enough that Dan could pretend he hadn’t heard him.

He cradled his broken glasses in his hand and then pushed himself up off the floor. Dan stood up too, resisting the urge to grab Phil by the arms and steady him. The guy couldn’t even stand up without wobbling a bit. He was like a human jenga tower.

“I need to call a friend to help me get to the glasses shop,” said Phil, easing his phone out of the pocket of his tight jeans. “I can’t really navigate the tube by myself in this condition.”

Dan wanted to offer to be Phil’s guide, but that seemed too forward. They were complete strangers. Dan could be a cannibal or a serial killer for all Phil knew, just biding his time until he could push him off a platform in front of an oncoming train.

They stood awkwardly facing each other. Phil fidgeted with his glasses in one hand and his phone in the other. Dan tugged at the hem of his black t-shirt, pulling it further down over his hips.

“Well,” said Phil.

“Well.”

Phil smiled—warm and bright and devastatingly cute.

“Thanks for all your help, Dan. I think I’ll head out to the lobby and make that call now. You can get back to whatever you were doing before I interrupted your day.”

“You didn’t interrupt anything important,” he blurted out.

Phil smiled again, dipping his head to look bashfully at the floor.

He made to leave. Just as he was opening the door, he turned to Dan and asked, “Do you come here often?”

Dan rolled his eyes at the line, but happily replied, “Yeah. All the time.”

“Well, then, I hope I’ll be _seeing_ you around,” said Phil, attempting to wink but just closing both eyes.

Dan groaned, but he couldn’t keep a grin off his face.

“You did not just say that.”

“I did.”

Phil started sliding out of the bathroom, sidestepping while still looking at him. Dan waited until he had almost disappeared, then hurried over and caught the door right before it closed.

“Wait!”

He stuck just his head out. Phil’s face was right there. Their noses were indecently close.

They both stepped back at the same time, and the door swung shut between them again.

Dan could hear Phil giggling on the other side.

“Alright, stand back. I’m coming through.”

Once they were both out of the bathroom, sitting next to each other on a bench in the lobby, Dan offered to stay with Phil while he waited for his friend.

“You really don’t have to. She works in the area. I’ll just send her a text and I’m sure she’ll be here soon.”

Dan shrugged. “I already told you I’ve got nothing important to do. Someone needs to keep you from accidentally breaking every bone in your body.”

“Breaking every bone in my body? While sitting down?”

“I’m sure you could manage it.”

Phil laughed and smacked Dan’s shoulder. Then he pulled his hand away, looking at it in horror.

“Oh, god.”

“What? What’s wrong?”

“We never washed our hands.”

**Author's Note:**

> me? writing a fic with a one word title that ends on a line of dialogue? revolutionary. thanks for reading.
> 
> [ tumblr post ](https://velvetnautilus.tumblr.com/post/176121361046/glasses-rating-g-word-count-11k-summary-dan)


End file.
